You are welcome.

I, like you, came out of the CMA. My response to them was a great release. Today when people ask me where I go to Church I just tell them that “I can’t go to Church.” They always ask, why,? and I tell them, “because I am the Church.”

I work in the commercial refrigeration industry and was doing a job for an acquaintance of the CMA church I came out of. This person and I talked a little while the other day, when he first called needing the work, and he used all the religious language that would make one think that he was very righteous in his life and dealings. Having known the man previously I was not tricked by his talk, it was the same talk they all used over there. He was not available when we did the job so his son had to let us in. I asked the son where his father was, and he said, without hesitation, that his dad was in Vegas gambling. When you consider that he and his son attend this Church, is it any wonder that he is divorced and that his son is living with a girlfriend? This is the organizational church of today.

Like you, I have no regrets of leaving, but there was times that I did miss the friendship and the religious jostling over doctrine, but today my family and I live in the ever present fellowship of the Holy Spirit. I know what you are experiencing, it is natural. Time is growing short for this world so hold onto Jesus for your very life, and He will be everything you need.

You and PK are both dear friends, and I think and pray for you often.

Abide in Him, and He in you,

Steve B.

Thanks for providing this post along with the link that takes you to jesuslifetogether.com – I have been reading chapter by chapter in the book titled, The Traditions of Men, and have truly been blessed and encouraged by it.

Though I left the Christian Missionary Alliance church over 3 years ago, I still get remarks from friends that I need to be in church – or how do I expect my children to know God if I do not demonstrate the value of church…I continued to be amazed at the comments – as if God can only work in a confined building – though they do not say those exact words, in a nutshell, that is what they are saying.
I have no regrets leaving the institutionalized church, though I would be lying if I didn’t admit to my occasional doubts about my walk. But even through my doubts, God is ever increasing and I can taste more and more of the freedom that He offers. I also would be lying if I didn’t admit my desire to be surrounded by likeminded believers – I crave fellowship – but not the kind that I was exposed to in church, but rather, this fellowship that is solely based on the love of Christ and His truth – - not the superficial elements of cell groups and meetings – I am so thrilled that God has called me away from that…I am thankful that I have “stepped up to the plate”…a comment that my pastor at the time, stated to me when he asked if I could drive the youth group to teen retreat and I said that I would have to check and see about getting off from work…”Well, Sherry it is time for you to step up to the plate” – -I was shocked – that was the measurement of my walk with the Creator. I was already doing, doing, doing, in the church – how much would he consider enough? Well, I do not have enough in me to ever deserve what Christ has freely given me – this I know! And with this realization that Christ has given me, I have tasted what He means by His rest – -have I comprehended all things? You already know this – No! But I am ever thankful that He is guiding me and am so grateful for His love and patience with me – to see me through the cultivating of my own salvation.

Wow, I apologize for rambling.

Again, thanks for the post and the link.
sherry

I understand your dilemma. We must be aware of whether we are just practicing acceptable Christianity or whether we are being led of the Spirit.

For the past five or six years I have been going to a men’s fellowship that meets on Saturday mornings and is part of the CM&A church. My attendance there was as an outsider asking the tough questions, planting seeds, and looking for growth. My presence there was a thorn in the side for most of the men and the group went from about fifteen to two over that period of time. After I wrote an open letter to the congregation, after some worldly activity of the pastor, I was encouraged to leave. The two men who were part of the group left also. They went back into the organized church but we continued to meet at the local Burger King on saturday mornings “religiously”.

Much effort was invested in those two souls: meetings, letters, study, prayer, trying to get past just “church.” The question became, “how much effort is supposed to be invested in soil that does not produce growth. Today was my last meeting with those men. Through the advice of a dear sister I gently shut the door on our relationship and went my way. The Spirit had for some time been telling me to brush the dust from my shoes and move on. We must invest our lives where the Spirit leads, but where there is no life, no activity, no moving towards the light, just lessons on theology and talking about our problems with no resolutions, we must move away.

I can appreciate the fact that you are teaching English, but what exactly is the fruit you see? Is it an insatiable desire to move toward the Light, or just memory verses and an understanding of the language, without an understanding of the “Spirit”? If we have not had a glimpse of Him who is invisible then it is just religious hobby craft, and that is all. If we are drowning in our own busyness we probably need to examine our true motives. Is the work a river or a stagnating pond? Is there life moving through it watering the land, bearing fruit, or is it just an accumulation of stuff without the power to reproduce? is it Living water, or dead works?

We must find and invest ourselves in souls that God is preparing as a fit bride for His Son, and not in the masses that fill church buildings desiring only religious services. If what we are doing only produces fatigue and no joy, we may need to ask how much more needs to be invested in that soil?

I will ask Father to help you,

Steve B.

This is exactly where I am finding myself – worn out every day and wondering what happened to the time I used to find for prayer and Bible study. It seems like I am short on time, all the time. It’s not that I am doing things I ought not be doing. I am spending a lot of time attending church and ministry functions and spending time on other people’s problems. But, like the man profiled here, I am so worn out by all this I wonder what I can change.

I stay up late teaching my internet students English, using the Bible and am seeing good fruit from that. But, by the time I’m done, I no longer can stay awake to pray or attend to my own spiritual needs.
I never get to bed early, never am able to get up early. I’ve no time for blogging and my person to person witnessing is almost non-existent. I don’t want to be selfish and spend all my time on spiritual things and end up ignoring my wife and neighbors. But, I do miss all those endless hours of blogging, studying and praying. I became convinced I was being selfish and needed to spend more of my time in service to others. Now I’m wondering if I’ve got it all wrong. And if so, how much else have I got wrong?

I humbly ask for your prayers, brother. All doing and no effectual praying seem to be a bad bargain. I want to serve my God well, and need to scripturally honor and please my wife and family. I just need to re-balance my life.